Ok, first off if what you’re thinking is that this video is going to talk about literally dissecting Kirby than 1) you’re the cruelest person on the planet, and 2) no. This video is going to definitively tell you what a Kirby truly is. So, no, sadly this will not involve daring surgeons desperately trying to figure out what Kirby is while trying not to kill him, making mistakes on the way and going all dramatic like a generic plot of a movie: Introduction, then Oh No! Conflict!!!!, and then of course the resolution where everyone is happy, Kirby isn’t dead, and everyone has improved in their personalities. No, sadly this is not what you tuned in to see today.
Today, you’re (hopefully) reading an article a middle schooler (like I have said on countless occasions before) shows that he is smarter than some high schoolers by explaining the science of, of all things, video games. The thing that people act like is the cancer of modern entertainment, despite the fact that you can get as much if not more money than PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES. See? Video games truly are a modern sport (that don’t get extremely repetitive because there are different heroes, maps, modes, etc. other than just different people). Anyways, enough with that rant on how video games should be classified as a sport. Back to Kirby.
Kirby is a mystery to many people. No one across the vastness of the interwebses has any idea of what Kirby might be (other than just some random alien with the power of DEUS EX MACHINA on his side). But today, people that are reading this (and have also watched Game Theory’s episode on this topic as well but I mean … I need to stay on topic here.) I will prove to you that Kirby is, in fact, a giant, sentient form of the common day protist known as an amoeba. First off, we can know that there can still be remnants of some small little microscopic life forms on Earth (such as an amoeba) because we see it in the form of Shiver Star in Kirby 64, a frozen over apocalyptic Earth but still Earth nonetheless. So, I shall prove to you the POWER OF GOOGLE RESEARCH why Kirby is an amoeba.
First is Kirby’s ability to float and fly. We can relate this too an amoeba because if he had any bones, it would be very unlikely for him to fly with just some air. He also floats on the water like this but sinks when he doesn’t have any air in him. This means most likely that there is probably just a lot of fluid in him. We can also tell by the deformations of his body when he hits the ground. It’s just like a water balloon. An amoeba is filled with a lot of little organs (organelles) along with cytoplasm, a jelly-like substance. This would allow the deformations of his body to occur like we see in the game.
Another thing we see that is weird is when in Kirby Return to Dream Land when he swims and runs, his little… hand? Arm? Things? Lets just call them nubblies. When Kirby runs, his little nubblies just shift up and down his body, and in his swimming formation, his nubblies form on top of his face and then go down his side. This is just an amoeba’s ability to create pseudo pods. Greek for false foot. What happens is a lot of cytoplasm forms up on one part of the cell, pushes out from the cell, and then there you have it! New appendage formed from nothing else than just some fluid.
Another thing we see is that when Kirby latches on to things, they just sort of stick to his nubblies. Never once do we see him sprout fingers to actually grab them. However, he is making a conscious decision to stick to those things, otherwise anything he bumped, ran, or smashed into would stick to him. That would make for an extremely different game. By the end of it Kirby would just be a giant ball of dead enemies and giant pieces of rock or whatever. This is the ability of amoebas having semi-permeable membranes. This means that some things can pass through the cell membrane and some other things just can’t.
One more thing is that in the new games, Kirby got himself a guard ability. This allows him to take a defensive stance, and he somehow with the POWER OF SCIENCE is able to take like 1 damage every hit. Amoeba’s also have themselves a sort of guard ability. What happens is on the edges of the cell membrane under bad circumstances, amoebas can form cysts, which is basically a super hard wall. Now, now that I have given you so many examples, it is proven that Kirby is DEFINITELY an amoeba.
Wait? What? Oh yeah, that thing. Kirby’s most known most widespread ability: his copy ability. Sorry, almost forgot. So basically what happens is Kirby sucks in a living enemy, and then swallows him whole and takes the abilities of that enemy that will help him survive. This is just an amoeba’s ability to do endo-symbiosis. Endo-symbiosis means a “close interaction between two things that is formed on the inside”. In other words, amoebas ingest a living organism, and, with writing and re-writing of genetic code, takes the attributes of the other organism that will help him survive, which is exactly what Kirby does. He doesn’t just swallow a Waddle Doo and gain its antenna thingies, it gets the beam ability. Something that will help Kirby to survive. Now that I TRULY have definitely, DEFINITIVELY answered the question of what the heck is. Kirby people have been asking for generations, you’re going to go and maybe tell one person this and then forget about the whole thing after clicking of of this page. (How generous of thee.)